Having Naive, Overeager, Excitable Energy Around People

One way some younger people can seem socially awkward is when they have "puppy dog energy". The image gives you a good idea of what the phrase means, but to break it down more, someone who has that vibe can come across as:

• Overly eager
• A bit too energetic
• Overly excitable
• Naive, innocent, or inexperienced
• Overly talkative
• Overly, almost forcefully, friendly
• A tad too cheerful and peppy
• Trying too hard to please
• Trying too hard to be entertaining or the center of attention
• A little socially clumsy overall

Having puppy dog energy isn't always seen as a problem. Someone may think it's cute or endearing, or simply feel neutral about it. However, at times people may find it a bit annoying or overbearing, or see it as a sign of immaturity.

It's not inherently bad to be bouncy and cheerful, but sometimes coming across this way can get in the way of your social goals. Friends or classmates may think your eager energy is a bit much for the situation, or write you off as a clueless kid who should be past being so jazzed up about everyday stuff. It may overshadow other facets of your personality that you want to get across.

What causes someone to have puppy dog energy?

Here are some factors can lead someone to behave that way:

• They naturally have a more lively, cheery personality.
• They are inexperienced with parts of life, and still get excited about them at an age where most other people are used to those things (think of college students who are giddy at the prospect of doing shots in bars, while older adults don't think drinking is that big a deal).
• They have some anxiety in social situations, which they may or may not be fully in touch with. Some people get quiet and reserved when they're nervous. Others get talkative and energetic, and try too hard to win everyone over.
• They may believe they have to grab the spotlight in conversations, otherwise they're going to be disliked or overlooked. Again, they might not be aware this is what's driving them.
• They have ADHD, and their version of it makes them always seem a little wired and bouncy.

What can you do if you have puppy dog energy around people?

First, you don't necessarily have to do anything. You may be fine with your friendly, energetic nature and not feel like it has any negative impact on your social life. Though if you do decide you want to dial it back when it suits you, here are some things you can try:

• Consciously try to act in a more relaxed, grounded way - Make an effort not to speak so quickly or so much, don't bombard people with jokes or friendly questions, try to be more physically still and not fidget or bounce around.
• Before meeting people, or just as you're starting to speak with them, take a moment to tune into your emotions and urges. See if there's any anxiety or an inner pressure to people please or put on a show. Sometimes just recognizing your instinctive motivations is enough to get more control over them. After spotting them you can try taking a moment, and maybe some breaths, and see if the feelings start to settle down on their own. If they don't, you can follow the above point and actively try to behave differently.
• Longer term you can work to address issues, like social anxiety or people pleasing tendencies, which contribute to your puppy dog energy at its root.
• Over the long haul you can also try to get more life experience and knowledge, so you don't seem so wide-eyed and thrilled at things your peers are already used to.

Related: Being Less Naive And Innocent And Getting More Of An Edge